What's that smell?!

Hello All:

WHOSE READY TO PLAY: "What's-That-Smell"!!?

That's right, once again, it's time to play "What's That Smell" (international version).

Jodi loves playing "what's that smell" and she will tell you that you usually have to be in close proximity to me to play.  Well, this time you had to be at Camp Lemmioner this past Tues night.

I was outside Tues night and there was a bit of smoke and haze in the air accompanied by a foul smell, one which I had never encountered before.

Turns out that someone had dumped a couple of camel carcasses at the city dump (about 1 mile away) a few days prior.  Camels are fairly large animals and I am not sure how they got them there.  I am confident that they were not passing by and just keeled over.

At any rate, city workers decided that they couldn't just let camels rot at the city dump, not to mention wild dogs who were helping themselves to the buffet.  The solution:  dose the dead camels with diesel, light them on fire, walk away. 

I guess that is one way to handle it. 

Changing subjects, I just finished up my rather lengthy check-in process which included "welcome aboard" briefs from the CL Base staff as well as the CJTF-HOA staff.  I think some efficiencies can be gained as the two briefs were largely the same. 

One of the briefers was throwing out some factoids which inspired the next few paragraphs on the country of Burundi, which is east of Tanzania and providing thousands of soliders in support of the Transitional Federal Government of Somolia.

Burundi is a land mass of 10,800 sq miles which is the same size as Maryland.  By comparison, Sudan measures 967,0000 sq miles which is three times the size of TX (and throw in CA). 

Its population is 10 million which is double that of Maryland and equal to that of Michigan. 

It is also one of the 10 poorest countries in the world with a per capita Gross Domestic Product of $108 annually (US per capita GDP is $47,500).

Up until the past couple of decades they produced no electricity internally and purchased it from neighboring countries.  They now produce 43 Mega Watts of power with 32 MW coming from hydro-electric facilities.

Like Burundi, CL also produces electricity using a dozen or so Caterpillar diesel powered generators (not the ones you buy at Lowe's, these are the size of tractor trailers).

CL produces 27 MW of power, or about 62% of what the country of Burundi produces. 

Glad I live in the US of A.

Until next week,
Michael

Prison or Paradise?

Hello again to all.

This week we examine whether Camp Lemmioner (CL) is more closely aligned with a prison or a paradise.  While your initial estimate may favor one over the other, you may be surprised after taking a closer look.

1.  Lodging:  In my last blog, I noted the similar dimensions of my quarters compared to a prison cell.  My room is slightly larger but lacks a sink and toilet, which a prison cell has.  Sure, the door locks from the inside and not the outside but that is not enough to offset the sink/toilet upgrade.  Lock me in my room during the hours I am asleep, not a big deal.

Edge:  Prison.

2.  Access to the facility:  Both places feature very high walls topped with razor wire, tightly controlled access in and out, and armed guards.  Those at CL can leave the camp for the day with prior approval.  In prison, you can leave the facility but the best you can hope for is a chain gang or picking up trash along the highway.  At CL, I can move about freely 24/7.

Edge: CL

3. Alcohol:  At CL, you are permitted to have (3) beers or servings of wine per day but it can only be consumed on the premises in the two places that serve.  You need to have your ration card and ID; cost $3.50.  No alcohol in your room, hard liquor is prohibited.  In prison, all alcohol is prohibited.  However, alcohol is easily produced using fruit, sugar, and yeast.  The resulting "hooch" probably leaves something to be desired given how bad it probably tastes but it is free and you can make it in your room (cell).  Sure you have to hide it in your toilet so the "screws" don't find it when they toss your room upside down looking for contraband but at least you have a toilet.

Edge:  Prison (due to the permissive enviroment and low cost)

4.  Food:  3 squares at CL and prison might make this one a draw.  The food in prison doesn't look very good based on the movies I have seen.  I don't think they have a salad bar either.  CL has food available 22 hours a day, fresh cut fruit, salad bar, NY strip steaks on Sat for dinner (usually overcooked), and "seafood Friday" (I had (3) 4 oz lobster tails, yum). 

Edge:  CL

5.  Recreation:  If you have a captive audience and you don't give them something to do, they will find something to do.  Prison has the rec yard for various athletic activities, in room TV,  movie night, library, and knitting club.  CL has air conditioned gym, basketball/volleyball court, movie night, sports leagues, karaoke at the primary recreational facility where there are also pool tables, wireless internet, ping pong and darts.  I also play Texas Hold'em on Tues and Sat (they play cards in prison too). 

The kicker is that CL sponsors off base recreational trips to include restaurants out in town, scuba diving, snorkeling and shopping excursions.

Edge: CL

Weather:  Most prisons are in fairly agreeable climates except for TX and AZ and you only get limited time in the yard anyways.  CL is located in Djibouti City, Djibouti, which typically has some of the hottest temps on the continent.  Summer temps typically 110-120F and high humidity.  Let's face it, it is pretty damn hot here and most people walk wherever they need to go. 

Edge:  Prison (outside of TX and AZ)

Bedding:  As previously posted, I have sheets made from a 50/50 cotton polyester blend.   Fabric of prison sheets could not be determined through my research.

Edge:  Inconclusive

Well, an interesting result....3 to 3 with one going to neither. 

Given the fact that you don't have to join the Aryan Brotherhood/ Mexican Mafia/Black Guerilla Family to stay alive, not getting shanked in the yard, and dudes aren't getting raped in the shower, I'll have to give an extra point to CL, making them the winner. 

Now, if I could only get them to ditch the cotton/poly sheets, we would really be in business.

Cheers,
Michael

Greetings from Africa (again)

Hello all and welcome if it is your first time, welcome back otherwise.

As most of you know, it was time to deploy again (it had been over 2 years since my last one, so not too bad). I was sent to the Combined Joint Task Force - Horn of Africa (CJTF-HOA) in Djibouti City, Djibouti, to serve as the Deputy Director of Strategic Communications.

Strat Comm is defined as: Focused US Gov efforts to understand and engage key audiences to create, strengthen, or preserve conditions favorable for the advancement of US Gov interests, policies and objectives through the use of coordinated plans, themes, messages and products, synchronized with the actions of instruments of national power.

I can tell you that it has been quite a journey in the making. I detached from my previous command on 11 Jun to the Deployment Processing Center in order to begin and complete the required predeployment training. I had most of it done before I reported in so I had lots of half days/days off.

I thought I would be leaving around 25 Jul for Africa but the best the Marine Forces Africa Liason Officer could do with booking tickets was 5 Aug. There was really no "work" for me to do as I was simply awaiting travel. This meant that I just had to call in every day to let them know I didn't die in my sleep and was still ready to go.

WOW! 11 days of free vacation. I can say that it was time well spent in Sneads Ferry. Made a point to eat at places which I enjoy because it would be a long time before I got to eat there again. Additionally, I got to swim in the community pool which was supposed to be open at the end of Jun.

Ok, vacations over. Time to deploy.

I loaded up Jodi's vehicle with all my bags and we were off to the airport to catch a flight at 2:20 pm. Jodi sat with me at the airport for a bit and she then went on her way after a tearful goodbye.  Well...we didn't know it was raining in Charlotte, NC, where I was headed. My flight was cancelled which meant I would miss my connection to Paris. The entire itinerary was shot.

I called Jodi and told her what happened. She was really pissed having just gone through shipping her husband off for six months. Mentally, she had prepared herself and this was just screwing that up.

The flights I had were for a Fri and the trip got rebooked on the following Tues for Thurs (11 Aug) travel. I was again ready for travel that would span 3 days and 2 nights.  I left Thurs with a slight delay in Charlotte. I had a short layover and then an overnight flight to Paris.

I landed in Paris this past Fri morning and had 15! hours to kill.  Thankfully, I am friends with the Commanding Officer of Marine Security Guard (MSG) Region 5, which covers Paris. I contacted him and he put me in touch with the MSG Paris Det Commander. The Det Commander told me that they would be more then happy to host me for the day! I grabbed a cab to the Marine House where they all stay and was met by the Deputy Commander who was serving as my escort officer. He showed me to my home where I took a much needed shower.

After my shower, he told me he had about 45 minutes of work to do at the US Embassy and after that, we would be off to see the city. The embassy was really cool, if nothing else to say that I was there. Turns out that that it is pretty quiet there and nothing like what you saw in the Bourne Identity.

The guided tour of Paris was unexpected and we covered a lot of territory in less then 6 hours. Got to see Notre Dame (construction began in 1163), the Paris Opera House, The Eiffel Tower, the Arch de Triomph (the same one that division of Nazi soldiers paraded thru in 1940) and, of course, The Mona Lisa at The Louvre. The Louvre is huge and it would take you weeks to even glance at everything in there. The Mona Lisa was the rock star in the building with hoards of people surrounding the exhibit. The crowd must have been 25 people deep.

After a whirlwind tour of Paris, it was back to the airport and back to reality. I left on an overnight flight to Ethiopia and arrived at 0700. The airport was not as crappy as I recall but I think I was in a different terminal. Had a beer and cheeseburger for breakfast (you quickly lose the concept of morning, noon, night after spending a couple of nights on a plane where I get very little sleep).

I arrived in Djibouti around 1:oo pm and was happy to see that my ride was waiting for me (couple of guys from my shop showed up). After a short ride from the airport (Camp Lemmioner is on the other side of the runway), I had arrived at my home for the next 6 mos. It was getting late in the day so there really wasn't much time to do anything except get my room and get unpacked.

As a LtCol, I rate a single room with my own shower and toilet. I was shocked to find out that there is a 3 mos waiting list for this type of room. I'm on the waiting list for an appropriate room but a little pissed that any incoming LtCol is not slotted above the highest Maj no matter how long they have been on the list. I would gladly give up my room to house the enlisted Marines I lead but I will be damned if a Maj is going to have priority over a LtCol.

I am sharing a room with an Air Force LtCol . The room has no running water, so no toilet either. It measures 7'x18' for a grand total of 126 sq ft.  Research indicates that an average sized prison cell is 8'x10' for a total of 80 sq ft also shared by two. HOWEVER, a prison cell has a toilet, a pretty good trade off at 2 am when you have to take a leak.

How could things get worse I asked myself. That question was answered when I was making my rack (bed). As I unfolded the sheets, they just didn't feel right. I looked at the tag and sure enough...cotton/polyester blend. So long 600 count Egyptian cotton, hello cotton/polyester. What happened to the days of "only the best for our American service people??

So, as you sleep soundly tonight on your 100% cotton sheets, know that deployed service people everywhere are sleeping on cotton/poly blend.